Watch this space ...

Yes, I know! Protracted absence and pretty boring really. Spice (well at least posts!) promised soon.

So, until that moment, a little peek into the corner of LittleStar's bedroom::
(lots of homemade, crafty goodness in this weeny little space)

Oooh, and aren't these butterflies just gorgeous?? See here for more about this fabulous collection.

Liberty print - aren't they divine?

Chat soon (I promise!),

Stella

4 Hats

This is one of my hats. that's the crafty one! The one I want to spend more time with ... but sadly, usually the first one to be sacrificed.

This is one of the hats I made for one of BigStar's dolls while we were all bunkering down for sick week! I made a whole outfit for her - but first I need to lament ...



And it's the lament of MANY of the creative Mums I know out there. How do you find the balance??

The hats I am constantly taking on and off are:
:>the crafty one :>the studious one :>the professional one :>the maternal one

And which one wins??? Sometimes they all fight against one another and sometimes, I just want to take them all of and let my hair fly free.

And, did you notice? As I did only once I had written the list?

There is no Stella hat. Not one where I get to be just me. Not being for any particular purpose, but just being.


That has been what I have been struggling with this past month or so ... finding that time for me. And I know I'm absolutely not alone here ... I'm just feeling a bit, well, absent. But I'm here now so I'd better make the most of the 32 minutes of me time I have left!!

After Easter, I travelled to another city for an education conference and I loved it. I missed the Stars and the Husband, but it was actually quite liberating to have no-one to answer to for a week. We had a really dynamic presenter and I came back so inspired to be an even better teacher that I spent a great deal of 'me' time afterward preparing resources and actually having fun with my classes. I teach special needs students and I implemented things that I thought were beyond them ... and they surprised me and deeply touched me with their ability to get a lot of it ... and the difference it made in such a short time was incredible. So, of course, as often is the way, inspiration and success bred motivation and dedication and my 2-day-a-week job became a 5-day-a-week commitment and the only hat I have worn for a while has been the professional one. Very rewarding, but the other hats were wilting with neglect. Especially the maternal one (but of course I keep putting that one one at the bookends of each day).

BUT, the studious one is very very tight and if I don't wear it often enough it shrinks!! The only thing to keep it stretched is regular wear and so, when not wearing the professional hat, I have needed to squeeze into the studious one to keep my supervisor off my back. I keep telling myself I can convert it into a bit floppy hat by the beginning of next year (but damn that feels like a long way off from here ...).

Are you seeing a picture here?

Frequently worn professional and studious hats.
Neglected maternal hat (but still worn daily).
Absent crafty hat ... and that's the one I feel that I need to feed me ... but ...

... but ...

... the first to go.

And now, I NEED to drag it out of the bottom of the craft basket and put it on again.

So here goes ...

Step 1: Sit in my favourite evening crafty spot
Step 2: Pull out my yarns and hook
Step 3: Sigh ... and start

Step 4: Write a post for my blog ... a reminder of recent crafty moments ... and fuel for more ...

So, here are a few more pics of BigStar's recent requests.


Isn't she gorgeous? I think this photo could be little blurry, but you can see how pretty she is. Her name is Nina and she was a gift from BigStar's godmother for Christmas and she really is like a little best friend for her. She talks to her and sings and dances with her, although I have had to make Nina sleep in a little Barbie bed beside BigStar's or she would have been trashed in a week (BigStar is only 3, after all!!). But she insisted, while laid up for days on the couch, that Nina needed more clothes to wear and, because I had this lovely soft cotton in my bag due to other projects, we designed and made a gardening outfit for Nina (BigStar's label here, not mine - I tend to wear much more practical outfits when I'm in the garden!!). BigStar is quite delighted with it.

I actually had fun making such tiny, soft little pieces. Next time, we'll include more colour ... but I'm quite happy with these sweet little prototypes. Although don't ask me how I actually made them! I kind of made it up as I went, but next time I am determined to write it all down and share it here once I actually have some steps to follow. I do, however, now have something to go by ...

And Nina won't have to be naked in the garden!

And now, I'm very happy that I've completed Step 4 ... but Step 3 needs so some attention ... so, computer packed away and hook in hand, it's time to sigh ...

Chat soon,
Stella xx

InsideOutside ... Crafty Spots

This is where I sit in the afternoons while the Stars are asleep and enjoy some space and sun just for me. The day is calm and quiet and I see random people walking by on their way to and from the train station and bus stop through the park. The bus is actually a free bus to my uni, so I am sometimes one of those randoms, but on Home Days at about 2pm you'll find me right there, making things. 

Usually, there is also a cup of tea close at hand, although I took this photo while the kettle was boiling so it's not there yet.

The Stars and I made chocolate muffins yesterday for morning tea and they really do make rather a lovely afternoon tea as well!!

We are lucky enough to live right next to a large public park and we all (including the pooches) make Great Use of it whenever we get the chance. This afternoon, after Nap Time, we gathered our baskets and wandered into the bushland to collect treasures. First we visited 'our' bowerbirds nest to see if he had collected any more blue bits and then started finding interesting leaves, dried seeds, sticks, pebbles, flowers, paper bark and any other things which took our fancy. We'll be making some artworks with them tomorrow. Then we walked all the way to the top of the park to the playground for a push and slip and a rock. A very basic little set-up, but to the Stars it is as good as any great adventure park AND, even better, it's just a short walk away. We don't even have to lock the house.

The second pic above is the view to the park from my favourite armchair and the next is a pic of the Stars escaping on the weekend in a break from the rain.


























My favourite outside spot is a morning spot, when the sun comes streaming onto our back deck at perfectly morning tea time. I couldn't get a great shot of it this morning because of the extreme light variation, but I'll show you the best I got, including guest appearance by Little Star. It does seem a little, well, colourless at the moment but, don't worry. I have plans ...

And from here, I often have that feeling of absolute and complete ... well ... Completeness. I have a cup of tea at my side, a project on my lap, pottering Stars and sunshine (as I'm only usually out there when it's a sunny morn).

If I look down to the back I can see little girls in the vegie patch ...

If I look straight across I can see little girls having tea parties ...

(I admit a cheat here - I took these a couple of months ago while BigStar was entertaining her favourite CuzStar and the garden was looking particularly gorgeous).

















And looking to the deck, I see little girls playing, eating, drawing, dancing, giggling ...


My heart Sings with happiness on these mornings, and I had one today.

A Happy Day.












And now that this post has taken so long I'll have to leave with a teaser for the next one ...

A little project for BigStar on request while we've been sick the past couple of weeks.

And on that note, chest x-rays tomorrow to try and get to the bottom of LittleStar's continuing ills. Will be happy for a definite answer so we can treat it one and for all. But, must go now as I'm making a gift for my sister (again, by request!!) and I want to have it finished for tomorrow.

Hooky, hooky, hooky ...

Chat soon,
Stella
xx

More please?

As I was tucking in BigStar the other night after another round of The Germs, she looked at me so pathetically that all I could do was cuddle her in close and whisper in her ear "I love you the whole world" (a favourite saying of ours which she invented one day). She smiled so bravely and asked,
"Mum?"
"Yes sweetheart?"
"Can you make me some more hearts for my bedroom when I get better? They make me feel like the germs go away."

And that moment was one of the sweetest I have had during the whole time of Vomit (two)Week(s). I had only finished them for her a few weeks ago, using the fantastic pattern shared by Julia Crossland and she was SOOOO excited when they were installed across the top of her wardrobe. She insisted I started making a set for LittleStar straight away, although her wardrobe is considerably bigger and a few other projects have gotten in the way (including Vomit Week) and so they are not finished yet. Soon ...

I love BigStar's bedroom. It makes me smile every time I walk in, and even many times when I just walk past as I do several hundred times a day (our small house means everything is in 'glimpsing distance' without having to take too many steps). It is happy and cosy and colourful and inspiring. I know she loves it just as much as I do and LittleStar has even started to feel the pull and can be found sitting quietly on the little couch, with many books arranged around her. This is a favourite place to be on Mondays and Tuesdays when BigStar is at pre-school.

I asked BigStar one day if I could move in and she looked at me in wide-eyed shock.

"But Mum! You wouldn't fit! And Dad would be lonely. You can't come, Really."


My Mum made the patchwork cushion on the red armchair, along with a matching bassinet quilt and cot quilt as a Welcome To The World gift when BigStar was born. I've been meaning to take a good shot of the quilt and I'll have to get around to it (in other words, get off my Lazy Bum!). I just admire Mum's skill in this soooo much. She made up the design and cut, stitched and quilted every piece by hand. Funnily, she thinks all of my crochet work is fantastic because she can't do it, but her needlework, it's just a thing of beauty every time she finishes something else.

My sister made the name canvas out of left-over scraps of fabric when Mum was finished. We are, in our own ways, a bit of a crafty kind of family. It's actually really nice to have someone to have creative conversations with who is often thinking along the same lines.


I'll have to show you LittleStar's sometime soon too.


My sister also made the hair-clip board with some bigger fabric left-overs. The toile (which you can't see too clearly) is just beautiful and Mum spent a great deal of time to find exactly the right design that she was happy with.

It's actually up a little too high for BigStar to help herself but, trust me, that is a Good Thing!!







Right now, I have several current projects on the go. I have finished some and will post about them soon, but now, it's bed time. I'll just show you the inspiration for the one which has been on my lap this evening ...

See those chairs? How do they look to you?

I hear you saying Empty. White. Hard. Cute, but Missing Something.

And you are Absolutely Right.

They are actually Star sized chairs and, whilst very well loved by the Stars, I know they would love them a whole lot more with something nice and soft to rest their little bots on. And, with winter coming on, a little something to warm their little leggs.

Yes, definitely. Can't wait till they're done.

Chat soon,
Stella
xx

An inauspicious beginning

Well, I did have great plans for a new beginning ... and then the LittleStar picked up a vomiting bug she very generously shared with the whole family and everything just fell apart. Still feeling a little on the queasy side, but at least I can keep a cup of tea down now (which is a very good thing as no tea was making me very Sad).

I have come to the conclusion over the past week that you can never have Too Many Towels! My house is not particularly big (a small cottage is really how you'd describe it) and I was recently looking at the rather large collection of towels we have in the linen cupboard and thinking I could ditch a few and free up some space. Fortunately, I am a fantastic procrastinator and they were all still there when Vomit Week arrived and I have used almost every single one of them - mopping, protecting, multiple bathing. I think they have well and truly justified their place in the cupboard (although I am hoping they will never need to be put to such use again!!). I used this as an opportunity to explain to very streamlined, organised and proactive Husband that procrastinating and hoarding are Good Things and, therefore, I am full of Very Good Habits!! He didn't actually agree, although that could be because he was being too ill for words at the time, but I'll take it as "of course Stella, I never should have doubted your procrastinating wisdom and hoarding judgement at all".

So, I haven't been working, studying or creating this week, but I though I'd show you a few of the bits that reminded me of happier times, catching a glimpse of them as I dragged myself from my miserable position on the couch to clean up yet another mess. Oh yeah, and did I mention I am Very Grateful that we have leather couches in our house?

.: Bit #1 that made me happy:.

This was my view from the sick couch this week. Husband bought me that clock for my birthday a couple of years ago and it quite genuinely makes me happy every time I look at it. I don't wear a watch and, due to the small size of our house, I can see it from almost everywhere inside. Everything else in this photo reminds me of Good Things in my life as well ... the Stars' eating, playing, creating table with their own little gallery next to it ... the garlic ropes hanging from the baker's stand that I grew and plaited myself ... the artwork that my sister gave me as a thank you for having her teenage son live with us for 3 months ... the gorgeous tasselled lamp that give a lovely, soft, red glow at night ... the easy clean leather armchair that really earned its place in the house this week ... the timber dresser that I bought when I was a poor and starving art student and cost me a fortune (in art student budgeting terms) and I have taken with me everywhere I've ever lived since ... I could go on, but you get the idea ...

.: And then I zoom in a little to Bit #2 that made me happy:.

The roses that BigStar and LittleStar picked from the garden with Dad just before Vomit Week started. They just glow with colour and beauty and health (exactly NOT like all of us this week).

.:And then, whenever I was able, this Bit #3 made me Really Happy (or maybe it was relieved?):.

I was desperate to just lie in bed and feel sorry for myself and Sleeeeeep I felt so rotten, but the Stars and Husband felt just as bad so really, there was little rest for this wicked one ...

And now ... I should be at uni today writing Amazingly Intelligent Things but my brain is not working in that way at all right now and I am using the quiet house (the Stars are well enough to be at daycare - which is probably where the bug came from in the first place) to recover and catch up and just Be Still. I even had a Nap, which is absolutely and gloriously decadent (and necessary - see above!). I have felt far too nervous to actually leave the house and the study is as far as I've ventured (Husband took the Stars this morning). I even still have washing on the line outside that's been there since Wednesday and I can't see it coming in today either. But that's OK, because at least we have clean sheets and towels in the linen cupboard (thank you clothes dryer). And isn't that a nice, circular way to come back to the beginning?? Almost a little bit clever (although, I must admit, completely unintentional!!).

So now, I will go back to another Bit, although this one made me sad earlier this week because I couldn't do it ... lucky for me now though, I think it'll be Good ...

Take care,

Stella
xx

And here we go again ...

Many years ago - yes, MANY - I lived in blogland and it almost saved my sanity. Then, I got busy in a way I had always hoped for, and abandoned my dear blog. I wanted to go back, I wanted to write, but the extreme exhaustion and elation of having a baby in my life meant that weeks, months and then a year went by and my dear friend was forgotten.

I felt Great Guilt, absolutely. I felt sad and a little lost. But, most of all, I felt Happy. The reasons for my lack of time were what I, and my blogmates, had been hoping, wishing, praying for all that time. And after the first one, I had another and I wasn't Wishing on a Star anymore:: I was hanging on for dear life as it became a Shooting Star across my universe.

And then, I closed an email account. Didn't think too much of that. Didn't think I needed it anymore. Until I decided I wanted to blog again and realised I had forgotten my long ago password.

Crap.

Tried EVERY option I could as I didn't really want to part with my beloved friend. But here I am, starting again. Two-timing almost. Guilty again. But again ... Happy. I LOVE blogging and I have different things to write about now. I am not seeking so much now as finding. I am creating and being and believing and thinking and now, I want to be sharing. Perhaps a new home is a good thing. I can link back to that sadder, frustrated time, but I don't have to stay in it.

I studied and taught Art for years:: my natural me. However I lost a big part of myself when all that stopped as I climbed the school administration ladder and accidentally became the head of a middle school. But then the babies came and I have been avoiding returning to full-time work ever since! I am still studying, but arty/crafty-ness isn't a part of it. I have ideas and needs bursting out of me and swirling around in my brain and it's time to really try and fit it all in now.

My Stars are funny and inspirational and joyful and painful and everything and more. And it is for them that I need to be who I can be and, now, here is part of that again (yay).

BigStar is now 3 and LittleStar is approaching 2. I paint with them and we make things and collect things from the garden to make our 'deck sculptures'. I love to crochet when I get time and I am in the middle of making Easter Eggs as a healthy alternative to the chocolate ones I'm sure the Grandparents will heap upon them. I've been making clothes for BigStar's doll collection (and she is such a dolly girl!) and decorations for LittleStar's bedroom. I'll post photos as soon as I get them onto my new computer and I will write the 'how' for some of them if I can overcome my sometimes DEEP laziness!!

So, in the meantime, I am here. And I will come out of my Lurkiness to reveal myself to the many inspirational others I have found. I am so Happy to be back (did I mention that?).

Chat soon,
Stella
xx